Dad Jokes One-Liners for 2025.
This is my latest personally curated list of amazing dad jokes for 2025.
Welcome to my 2025 Dad Jokes list—because groans are the true soundtrack of family bonding! Get ready for 30 sidesplitting one-liners, perfectly engineered for maximum eye-rolls and accidental snorts. Remember, laughter is the best medicine, but these jokes are not FDA approved!
- Why did the future, the present, and the past walk into a bar?
Things got a little tense. - Why don’t I tell you a construction joke?
Because I’m still working on it. - What did I say to my wife when I told her she should embrace her mistakes?
She gave me a hug. - Why did my computer keep sending me Kit-Kats?
Because I told it I needed a break. - Have you heard my joke about time travel?
You didn’t like it. - Why do parallel lines have so much in common?
It’s a shame they’ll never meet. - What happened when I read a book on anti-gravity?
It’s impossible to put down! - Why am I terrified of elevators?
So I’m going to start taking steps to avoid them. - What happened when I used to play piano by ear?
Now I use my hands. - Why can’t I put down my book on the history of glue?
Can’t put it down. - Why couldn’t I learn how to drive a stick shift?
I couldn’t find a manual. - Why does the graveyard look overcrowded?
People must be dying to get in. - What did my math teacher call me?
Average. How mean! - Why did I just write a book on reverse psychology?
Do not read it! - What did I tell my wife when she was drawing her eyebrows too high?
She looked surprised. - Why do I think claustrophobia is a strange condition?
But I think I can get myself out of it. - I broke my finger last week.
On the other hand, I’m okay. - Why don’t I tell you my chemistry joke?
I don’t think it will get a reaction. - Why am I friends with only 25 letters of the alphabet?
I don’t know Y. - Why did I try to write a book on teleportation?
But it’s going nowhere. - Why do I have a few jokes about unemployed people?
But none of them work. - What’s special about my dog’s magic tricks?
It’s a labracadabrador. - Why did I used to hate facial hair?
But then it grew on me. - Why can’t I tell you my joke about a roof?
Because it’s over your head. - Why did I tell my wife she was right?
It was a left turn. - Why am I on a whiskey diet?
I’ve lost three days already. - Why am I reading a book about anti-gravity?
It’s uplifting. - What happened when I tried to catch some fog earlier?
I mist. - Why did I once meet a time traveler?
But he was too ahead of his time. - Why did I ask the librarian if the library had books about paranoia?
She whispered, “They’re right behind you…”
We’d love to hear from you! Drop your thoughts or share your favorite joke in the comments below—let’s spread some laughs together!