Dad Jokes about Halloween for 2025.
Welcome to my latest personally curated list of funny and cringe-inducing Halloweenjokes for 2025.
Get spooky with these fang-tastic Halloween Dad Jokes—because nothing resurrects a groan quite like my sense of humor! I promise these puns are more “boo-tiful” than terrifying, so don’t be afraid to laugh until you creak. Put on your pun-kin costume and prepare for some graveyard giggles!
- What do you call a haunted chicken?
A poultry-geist! - Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin! - Why don’t mummies take vacations?
Because they’re afraid they’ll unwind! - Why did Dracula become a vegetarian?
Because stakes were too high! - How do ghosts wash their hair?
With shamboo! - What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert?
I-scream! - What kind of music do mummies listen to?
Wrap music! - Why are graveyards so noisy?
Because of all the coffin! - Why did the vampire read the newspaper?
He heard it had great circulation! - Why did the skeleton go to the party alone?
Because he had no body to go with him! - What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school?
Spelling! - What’s a monster’s favorite play?
Romeo and Ghouliet! - Why did the zombie skip school?
He felt rotten! - What room does a ghost not need in their house?
A living room! - What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frostbite! - How do you fix a broken jack-o’-lantern?
With a pumpkin patch! - Why do witches ride broomsticks?
Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy! - How do you make a witch itch?
Take away her “W”. - Why don’t vampires have many friends?
Because they are a pain in the neck! - Why did the mummy get a promotion?
He was wrapped up in his work! - What’s a ghost’s favorite fruit?
Boo-berries! - What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?
Spelling. - Why do vampires seem sick?
They’re always coffin. - What did one candy bar say to the other candy bar?
I’ve got some Twix up my sleeve. - How do you organize a space-themed Halloween party?
You planet. - Where did the college-aged vampire like to shop?
Forever 21. - Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin. - Why don’t eggs tell jokes?
They’d crack each other up. - Give a man a plane ticket, and he flies for the day. Push him out of the plane at 30,000 feet, and he’ll fly for the rest of his life. [Ooh, too dark?]
[No answer required.] - Why are spiders so smart?
They can find everything on the web. - What’s a vampire’s favorite type of boat?
A blood vessel. - Why is it so cheap to throw a party at a haunted house?
Because the ghosts bring all the boos. - What does a zombie vegetarian eat?
GRRRAAAAAIIIINNNNS. - Why didn’t the skeleton climb the mountain?
It didn’t have the guts. - Why is no one friends with Dracula?
He’s a pain in the neck. - Ghosts are bad liars.
You can see right through them. - Pumpkin Patch-Up: How do you fix a broken jack-o-lantern?
With a pumpkin patch. - What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make?
Brrrroooom brrroooom. - Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?
Because they have no body to go with. - What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Frostbite.
We’d love to hear from you! Share your thoughts or drop your favorite joke in the comments below – let’s spread some smiles together!